In The Shadow

Last week we had some gorgeous days so Bug and I took the opportunity and went to the playground. Bug loved it and was running around like a madman. He's such a social little guy and was having such a fun time just being around all those kids. It was a big playground so I spent my time chasing Bug around making sure he was safe. I stopped short when I looked up and I saw that Bug was completely encased in my shadow. It just struck me that no matter how hard I try I can't keep my Bug safe from everything, the realization took my breath away. There is One who loves him even more than I do and in His shadow I pray he will dwell all of his days.

Psalm 91

¹ Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
² I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

³ Surely he will save you
from the fowler’s snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
⁴ He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
⁵ You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
⁶ nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.
⁷ A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
⁸ You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

⁹ If you say, “The LORD is my refuge,”
and you make the Most High your dwelling,
¹⁰ no harm will overtake you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
¹¹ For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
¹² they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
¹³ You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

¹⁴ “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
¹⁵ He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
¹⁶ With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”

New International Version (NIV)

11 Months of Bug

Dear Buggy,
We are running quickly towards your first birthday and I wanted to get some of the little nuiances of your 11th month documented. You remain to be such a joy to me and your dad.
You have developed a fascination with the cat. We have an outside cat that you are obsessed with. You love hanging out by the front door and get so excited when the cat comes to the door. When you get excited you quietly and excitedly say "oof oof oof" which is woof to you, it is so adorable. Everything is woof to you, you love animals! You do say meow as well but your first instinct is always woof. I've brought you into the pet store near us a few times just because I figured you would like it and I was right you would be happy to sit there for hours staring at the birds, lizards, fish and love when people bring their dogs in. Two of your best friends Taylor and Rebekah both have puppies and you love watching them play together, you will sit and just crack up watching their dogs run around.
We also went to a Phillies game with our friends Matt and Tracey, we were able to get some amazing seats thanks to Matt and his father. Your second game was spent in the first row leaning up on the dugout. You loved watching the game and everyone near by was amazed at how good you were. You would watch the field then look at the jumbotron then look around. I think you were just so excited by the crowd. There ended up being a rain delay and I got a little momma bear with some people pushing and shoving but you ended up sleeping for the whole rain delay and waking up to watch the rest of the game. It was one of those times that I will never forget, just a great time with our little family and our friends. Thankfully I have some amazing pictures to treasure.
You also lived through your first earthquake and your first hurricane. We were out walking one day when your daddy called asking if we felt that. Felt what? We had no idea that there was just and earthquake we were just having fun on our walk! It took awhile before I stopped worrying that your dad lost his mind and realized that there was, in fact, an earthquake. I'm hoping its your last! That same week we had a hurricane coming. I like being prepared for things but since I've had you I think its gone to the next level. We spent most of that week picking up things just in case we were stuck without electricity. I put you to sleep on the dining room floor just to have you near us, then when they started adding tornado warnings in we all ended up sleeping on a mattress in the kitchen. I just wanted my boys safe and all together! You were none the wiser to all this excitement though and weren't even impressed with our new sleeping arrangements.

This month you continued getting around more and more. You have taken a few steps here and there but you still like to hold hands and hold onto things. You love stairs and will take off like a shot towards any unattended stairs. You are very good at climbing them the problem is that when you are done climbing you just try to sit down and most of the time you would just topple back down if we weren't there to catch you. We've started letting you just crawl up the steps for bath time or diaper changes to let you get some practice and you love to crawl up and visit daddy in his office when he is at home. The look of pride on your face is priceless when you get to the top, if its possible you almost start crawling with swagger like "check me out". You are also starting to love doing things like unroll the toilet paper, run for the toilet to play in the water; basically you are starting this toddler destructive stuff. Its pretty funny right now but I'm sure it will get less funny soon :)

You also had your first year of the Labor Day Races and I'm so excited for the years to come. We've been going to the Island Heights Labor Day Races all of my life and I have only missed one year (last year because I was too pregnant), but more than me your Granny grew up going to the races and we have so much family history and physical family there that I just can't wait till you can participate. You loved watching your cousins do all the races this year, and you and cousin Lily were scouting out your competition for future races. Your dad and I raced in the Potato Relay, the 50 yd dash, the Three legged race and the pie eating contest this year to show you how it was done. You had a good time hanging with Granny, Uncle Wayne or any of the other family that was around while we were racing; I love that you are growing up with such a loving extended family. You are a blessed Bug!
You are just so fun Bug; you are a happy, silly, sweet, loving baby. I can't even describe how blessed I feel to be your mama. I love that right at this age we can make each other crack up with just a look. I can't wait to watch your sense of humor develop because you are so funny right now!! I can't even imagine how much laughter will fill our house in a few years and I look forward to it! Well I just look forward to more days spent with you and your dad to be honest. Now on the eve of your birthday I'm going to go up and kiss your sweet 11 month face and nestle you all snug in our bed.
I love you my sweet boy!
Your Mama

9 Month Newsletter

Oh my baby boy,
How is it that another month has past. I have so enjoyed watching you this month growing and changing. Its amazing watching someone adapt and change so much to the world around them, it inspires me to continue trying to change and better myself as well! I love watching you meet an obstacle and see your determination to overcome and get to your goal. You are a determined little boy, I know that the temptation will be there to control that but I pray that your daddy and I continue to encourage you to be the boy God made you. That determination will take you far.





This month brought about so many changes, the biggest is how vocal you have gotten. You have been saying Dada for a couple months already and Mama for not quite as long. Now you say Nana's for nursing which is ADORABLE. You also sing along with me when I sing songs and sometimes you just hum to yourself. You babble, screech, laugh and sing all the time. I love your little voice. You can click your tongue, play the recorder, and you also will hum while I pat your mouth to make silly noises. You also do this funny thing where you scrunch up your nose and breath in and out really fast, its so silly! You are quite the mimic and we will say things then randomly you will repeat them back to us; like Payton, Murdock, Good Boy. I wouldn't believe that you were doing it but other people hear it too.

This month you also took your first trips to the Beach! YOU LOVE IT!! You are definitely a bit timid when it comes to the ocean or the pool. You like to be right up on me with your head on my shoulders watching and you will sit like that and look at the ocean for a long time. If we are back at our blanket that's a different story. You love eating sand, much to Dada's chagrin. You also love the baby pool that Aunt Karen gave you and will happily sit in that for a long time. You also will actually nurse and take a good nap on the beach as well, which is SHOCKING(you are usually too busy in public to nurse or nap)! After we go to the beach we usually will go up for a walk on the boardwalk and you are even good for that!! I love that you love the ocean, I can't wait to watch you as you get older at the beach; jumping waves, making sand castles, having best friends for a day.

fun with the smallest three cousins

You are so happy, its pretty easy getting a laugh out of you. I try to make it my goal to get good belly laughs out of you every day and I don't think I've missed one. You are ticklish right up under your chin and on the top of your chest. Sneezing is hysterical to you, whether you are the sneezer or anyone else is. You love people and if someone is trying to get a smile or laugh from you, you are quick to happily oblige.

You are pulling yourself up on EVERYTHING, while you have stood before (with assistance) this month you have taken it to the next level. You pull yourself up whenever you can. You can also walk with the assistance of hands or furniture and take every opportunity. This is the first that we have needed to babyproof but you have gotten into everything this month. You love ripping books and paper, eating paper and make it your life's goal to grab my phone. You have moved from the army crawl to the full on regular crawl and you are quick to get where you want to go. A good amount of time is spent racing to electrical cords to try to eat them, ACH! So a good amount of my time is racing ahead of you to put them up and away.

You still are doing about the same with sleeping, some days that is harder on your mama than others. Generally though I try to remember that this is just a small small portion of my life that I get to have this special time with you and even in the middle of the night I try to appreciate that. I'm amazed though I can be nursing you to sleep and you will be sitting there with your eyes closed then flip over and start crawling without any hesitation. Usually you start laughing when you do this, you tricky baby :) You are just so curious that sleeping and eating take a back seat to exploring.

Bug and Payton's legs, oh my so sweet

Aunt Anna came to visit you from the frozen tundra of Minnesota and we had a crazy week visiting with them. We got to go to your cousin Gracie and Meghan's birthday party pig roast together. We had a blast visiting with family, singing karaoke and playing with the kids. It was so nice seeing Aunt Anna and her family and finally meeting your cousin Payton in person! You loved Payton but also loved Ryan and Kaila who were soo good with you! You also got to meet your Uncle Bill and Aunt Elrene from Michigan. We spent the week with Aunt Anna and family going to Philly(twice!), Ocean City, Seaside Heights, Granny's and Uncle Wil's then finally having one last breakfast out with them at the diner. It was so cute watching you with your cousins, your eyes lit up with them around you. We are really going to miss them!

We also have been hanging out with some great friends going strawberry, cherry and blueberry picking. You have so much fun with your sweet friends, sometimes you get so excited you bite them (and leave marks! ach!). It was pretty funny the day after you bit your little friend your other friend bit you and the look of indignation on your face was hysterical, I could just hear what you were thinking "why would anyone bite me!?! that hurt!" Overall you play well together, as well as babies play together anyway. Mostly you just steal toys from each other.
This month was chock full of activity and business and thankfully you go with the flow pretty well, sometimes better than your mommy. Having you with me really makes me try to slow down and enjoy things more. I know when we are super busy I'm missing little things like a toothy smile over a long breakfast, how you rub my arm as you fall asleep or the lengths that you will go to zerbert me. Those things make my day and make this Mommy gig, which is the toughest job of my life, more than worth it.

I am excited to see where this next month brings us, I have my ideas of the things you are just about to learn but I know you are going to do things on your own time schedule. I'm just happy to be on this crazy ride with you.

Love always,
Your mama

8 Month Newsletter

Hey Boo Boo,
Wow, 8 months. Good grief, how did we find ourselves here? Its so incredibly cliche but time has been flying by. It doesn't help that you don't seem to realize that you are a baby and just keep growing up!!
You have a sweet new baby cousin! Its hard to believe you have two cousins younger than you already (soon to be three!!). You look so big next to your little cousin Lily, I know its going to be a blink of an eye before you guys are running around causing havoc! It has been nice going to see them and spending time getting to know your sweet cousin. This coming month we get to meet your other little cousin. Well, we get to meet her in person, we Skype with her and her family often, but it will be so great to all be together.

We also had a visit from Uncle Ardvark, Aunt Nae Nae, Hannah and T! It was so wonderful seeing them and getting to spend some time together, they moved to Virginia before you were born. We miss seeing them so bad, but are so happy for their new life they have. I look forward to going down to visit them and making memories of crazy sleepovers! We had a great time seeing them and playing. You even got to take a bath with T, you two were so cute together!

Sleep! Oh yeah, that! Well this month you had to start taking naps in your crib. You were sleeping on our bed but you move soo fast that it just wasn't safe anymore. Wow, that was quite a transition! I didn't think I would make it. It took so long to put you to sleep the first few days but with patience and coffee we made it and now you nap relatively well. We also put you down in the beginning of the night in the crib and move you over when we go to bed. Its so cute when you wake up though because you pull down the bumper and call to me so the first thing I see when I come in your room are your little eyes looking between the crib rails.

You look so different to me this month. You are thinning out, I knew it would happen when you started moving around but knowing it and watching those rolls get smaller and smaller are two different things. You also have 8 teeth now, yes, eight! Your mouth full of teeth makes you look like such a little boy. Your hair has also gotten very blonde from being outside so much, its also developing curls in the back. Speaking of being outside, it seems like you do not really burn. I have no idea how you have that type of skin coming from the parents you have but its nice! I may be a little biased but you are a particularly adorable child. We get stopped all the time while we are out so people can say how cute you are.





We took a road trip out to Lancaster to visit some friends. I was a little worried on how it would go but it went pretty well. You were VERY tired of the car by the end of the day though. It was so worth it for the visit. We took a walk to a great park, went in a caboose from a real train, and got a tour of a chocolate factory(sorry no samples for you!). The best part of all was introducing you to some wonderful friends and just spending time with people we don't get to see often. I look forward to going out and visiting again soon and meeting a sweet new baby girl for you to be friends with. We also went to a bunch of parties; your Aunt Tink's birthday, Uncle Steve and Aunt Bern's Housewarming Party (in your Great Grandmom and Popeyes house), your cousin Jeffrey's birthday party and we also had a party for Cousin Hannah! Whew it was crazy but so much fun! I love watching you with these people that are so important to us! I hope as you grow older you value relationships with people and seek out people with great character to share life with.
You babble nearly constantly, most notably you say Dada. You LOVE your dada. He's been working from home 3 days a week and your smile when you know he is home is priceless. If you hear your daddy talking on the phone you need to see him. I will just hold you up just inside the door and you will just sit there and smile. You will just sit there smiling quietly until your daddy turns around then you giggle like crazy! You still have your morning time with daddy, he wakes up with you every morning and plays with you until he's ready to go to work. We definitely hit the daddy jackpot with him!

This month it really seems you have become more independent. You crawl around and play with all of your toys. You love having us play with you but can also play by yourself just fine. You love the swing we got for the front yard! I'm still wearing you and you are quite content to be worn most times, you do not like to sit still though so if I'm standing around you start fussing. You love to play peekaboo, you will take a blanket and cover your face then uncover it and laugh! When you nurse or when you are falling asleep you will rub my arms like I rub your back, it is pretty much the sweetest thing in the world.

I enjoy you so much. I am so blessed to be able to stay home with you. Every day I thank God for allowing me this great privilege. You are such a joyful little boy and my heart bursts with every belly laugh you gift to me.
Love Always,
Your Mama

7 Months of Bug!

Oh Boy,
You little man! Thats what I see now when I look at you, a little man. You are silly, curious, happy, vocal, energetic and wonderful! Its amazing to watch you learn about the world around you, express yourself and just growing to be your own separate person.

The beginning of this month you were just starting to be able to sit on your own and now you are an accomplished sitter and you are also moving! You don't flat out crawl yet but you are never where we set you down. You do this cute little army crawl and grunt and whine and just go for it. When you first started you would shove your face into the ground and crawl, how happy am I that you moved on! I have started realizing that I need to sweep and vacuum like 100 times a day to get all the tiny bits and flecks that you seem to find and instantly put in your mouth!!
You are a sleep fighter during the day it takes awhile to get you to realize how tired you are but you do have some tells. I know when you start flapping your arm that you are ready for a nap, when both arms are going watch out I have a sleepy bug on my hands. You also suck on your lips when you are tired. You are still waking up about 2-3 times a night, thankfully you only wake up for a snack and you go right back to bed. Also your wake up time seems to be pushing back to 5 am which is nice, I really wouldn't mind if you adjusted that to 9am :) You are ready for bed around 6:30 or 7 and love your routine.

You are all about the bath and your bath toys. Your turtle is definitely one of your favorite toys and you will carry it around in your mouth from the bath to get your diaper and pjs on and only relinquish it when the hope of food presents itself. You love the bath though and will splash and jump around. Its so fun watching you play with your bath toys!
You also got another tooth this month! You look like quite the hillbilly with one tooth up on top and two below. I adore your little toothy smile and the belly laughs that come out it! You love to laugh and your daddy and I both have our own ways of getting a laugh out of you. My favorite way is to pick you up straight out of the bathtub and kiss your spine, you get the biggest smile and giggle! Daddy goes for the fake sneeze and you go for it every time.
This month you had your first Easter. We celebrated by going to church then having Mom Mom and Pop Pop M over for dinner. Your dad and I aren't sure how we are going to celebrate Easter with you, whether we want to keep it just about our faith or to add in the Easter Bunny to the mix. This year we colored eggs and went to church, I'm glad to have another year to figure it out :) We also had two first communions, one for cousin Mason and one for cousin Grace. I love watching you with your cousins its so adorable to see how much they love you! I can't wait to watch you guys all grow up together, I'm so excited that you have so many so close in age to you! You are going to have 4 within around a year of your age, that just sounds like such fun :)
I can't forget to mention your first baseball game, of course it was a Phillies game! We were surprised with the gift of tickets by some of our favorite people, your buddy Luke's parents. What a treat! You and I took the train into Philly and got so many people commenting on your Phillies hat and sign. Daddy met us over at the stadium and you seemed to really be loving it!! After the game started you fell asleep and stayed asleep for a couple of innings. It got loud though as stadiums do, and I had to fight the urge to shush people! You and I ended up standing in the back of our section where you charmed the ushers with your cuteness. We had such a great time and bonus the Phillies Won!!
I'm a little late in writing this update as we have been so busy. The two weeks leading up to your 7th monthaversary were tough. There was not much sleeping going on and you just weren't acting yourself. Its hard to see when you are in the moment but I should have known that there were going to be some big developments going on and there were(those are for next months newsletter though!). Such is life, if only there was a way sometimes to take the focus back and see the bigger picture. I do try to take it a day at a time, always find things to enjoy in you, and be purposeful about being content in where we are; I'll continue working on this as I pray that you grow up on a house full of peace and joy. Thats not the easiest thing to create sometimes but your Dad and I are committed to it and with both of us working to create that tone in our house hopefully that is the type of home we have.
With the warmer weather you have started waking up with sweaty head and have started having a definite little boy smell. I look at you sometimes and I'm amazed at how big you have gotten. You look so different from that little baby I met 7 months ago and I am starting to see glimpses of the little boy in you. I'm trying to take in each special moment; nursing you to sleep at night as your hand rests on my cheek (or holds my nose), tickling your belly, singing to you, taking walks together, sitting on the front porch watching the neighborhood kids play. There are so many moments that go by that I know I'm going to look back on so I just try to take a mental picture, smell your little boy smell and hold onto it while its here. Tomorrow comes ever too soon.

not the best pic of daddy, I hurt his eyes trying to capture this sweet moment

All my love little one,
Your mama

6 Month Newsletter

My Buggle Boy,
There is a part in "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas" that says that "That the Grinch's small heart Grew three sizes that day!". That is the best way I know to describe being a mother to you. Every day I feel like my ability to love grows. This month was a month of changes, as every month seems to be since we've met! There are so many things that I thought I knew about being a parent, or ideas I held about how things were going to be; I learn every day that I was wrong. Its a good kind of humbling though and I'm happy to learn from you.
I had it set in my head that we were going to exclusively breastfeed till 6 months and I was holding strong to that. You had other things in mind as you lunged for my food and drinks day after day. Finally we relented about a week before 6 months and gave you your first official meal, banana and water. This was after your first unofficial meal which was sharing my apple the day before. I was a little surprised because you were very underwhelmed by the banana but LOVED your water. Since then you've had banana, avocado, blueberry and apple. Your favorite is apples, and you don't want me to cut it up really tiny or puree it; you like to use your teeth and shave yours right off of the apple.


This month we also had your dedication, it was a beautiful day filled with family and friends. I was so excited to have you dedicated, before you were born I felt very much like Hannah in the Bible. I wanted a little boy so much, I prayed and prayed. I can't even describe the desire I had for a son and after 16 months of trying and one miscarriage we were blessed with you. After Hannah had Samuel she said:

" I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him.
So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD.”
1 Samuel 1:27-28

This is how your Dad and I felt; we were blessed by God with you and we dedicate you to Him. We promise to raise you to know the love of God and teach you all about our faith. We pray that when you are old enough to make the decision that you will share our faith. We also picked your Godparents, Uncle Walter and Aunt Pam. It was a very difficult decision to pick them as you are surrounded by many Aunts and Uncles, Relatives and Friends who love you dearly.
You also had your first St. Patrick's Day! I don't know if you picked up on it, but St. Patty's Day is kind of a big thing in our house. Your daddy and I got married on St. Patty's Day! Daddy took a long weekend and we had so much fun together! You always seem most happy when the three of us are together. We had sushi and went to an indoor water park (your first time in a pool!). You weren't digging the water too much but we took you right during nap time which is just silly. Eventually you fell asleep in the wading river, proving once again if tired enough you will sleep anywhere. We also visited a couple of parks nearby one for a walk and one for a picnic. We put you on the swing and you loved it. Granny was impressed with how well you held on in the picture we sent her.

This month you also had your first tantrum. It was pretty funny, you are generally a pretty happy fellow and usually when you cry it is for a reason; so when you completely lost it in the bathtub we were stumped. Your dad had just used the blue plastic octopus cup to rinse your hair and then you lost it. Finally we realized that you WANTED THAT CUP!! While I wouldn't have guessed it, I kind of like these tantrums. Its just another way that we can communicate, I like that you know what you want and tell us! Eventually I hope you learn the tools to tell us in other ways but I do hope you always feel welcome to tell us your thoughts and desires.You also have gotten shy this month. You are still quick to give smiles but will hide your head on my shoulder or in my chest when people come talk to you. It is pretty adorable I must say! You also started splashing in the tub with your hands, you have always loved soaking anyone near you with your feet but the hands is a new one for this month.

he kind of reminds me of a marionette here

You have started reaching for people this month. The first time was to nurse at night then the first person besides Mommy and Daddy that you reached for was Aunt Pam. You are getting really good at sitting up on your own as well. You do fall over but you can stay up for awhile before you do. You haven't quite got the transition from sitting to hands and knees intentionally but I know its coming. You are really getting close to the crawling too, you generally will get where you want to go but it doesn't look like crawling yet. The other day you just scooted yourself across our bed on your back and pushing with your knees. More often than not you do this thing where you push with your feet and kind of jam your face into whatever surface you are on to get where you want to go. I am going to be so happy when you learn not to do this!!
You really enjoy a good book, I can usually get in 3-4 in a sitting without you losing interest. We read all the time and you love to listen to music too. I have caught you keeping time with the music which is already better than me!!
You are really enjoying the change in the weather which has led to more walks outside. We try to go every day and you love being in the BECO and walking! We go for at least 40 minutes at a time and you have never fussed while on a walk.

You are so much fun my boy. I am having a blast being your Mommy. You make me laugh, teach me and humble all at the same time. This Mommy gig can grow you like nothing I've known before.
Love Always,
Mama