can you tell i didn't bring my comp

sorry no updates people, Paris is wonderful. I will let you all know whats up and post lots of pictures :)
We have seen all the sights here and have driven Dan and Renee bonkers with our schmoopiness. :) Getting ready to leave Paris for Switzerland now, Got Tamara and Kaiya presents a second ago.. ohh la la....
hmmm ok sigts we've seen, Arch de Triumph, Eiffel Tower, Louvre, Notre Dame, other stuff too...
k bye peeps :)

incommunicado

Yeah so i haven't been writing lately because i've been hanging out with this hottie.
Seriously can you blame me?!?!!?

I love those sons of craps.....

I've been accused, thats right people. I've been told i have lost the love for two of my favorite people on the planet. Lisa and Kira...
How could i not have love for them? Lisa is a mini-me and Kira is my lil sis.
I even made up an animal, sounds and all for one of Kira's birthdays. If thats not love i don't know what is.
Seriously I giggle like a silly mongoose when i'm around the two of them so this post is dedicated to my girls...

In other news

The day that we went skiing it was pouring rain but it really made everything look gorgeous, kind of mysterious.. I felt like i was in some movie the whole day. Some crazy girl spy skiing movie..
Awe yeah i would kick some serious butt as a girl ski spy, if i could fit pirate in there that movie would make me a millionaire

Winter Retreat

So this weekend we took the kids on the winter retreat. It was incredible, I really feel like alot of us were changed this weekend, i know that we definitely became closer as a group. Also i learned how to knit from Mary and i skied!!! Without being broken!! Here is a pic of my daredevil self with Nikki and Brian ready to meet our doom on the double blacks...

Five Wierd Things

1.) I like wearing socks in my kitchen just to slide. If I go in the
kitchen barefoot I get slightly annoyed and sometimes I forget and try to
slide anyway. It doesn't work.

2.) I like to sip my drinks from a teaspoon especially if its something
that I like a lot. I like the fact that it lasts so long if I'm only
allowed to have it off of a teaspoon. I only really do this in private so I
don't think anyone knows this one.

3.) I like to freeze everything and then tease everyone else about their
freezer habits. For example at this moment I have pasta, cereal and
crackers in my freezer. Anne and my mother feel the brunt of this freezer
teasing, if they only knew the freezer horrors they would find if they
opened mine. I tease anne for freezing cookies and I have cereal in mine,
tee hee if she only knew, if she only knew.... Ok lets face it my mom
deserves it the woman has loose bagels in hers and it is packed to the brim.

4.) I'm genetically incapable of keeping my house warm. No matter how
much money I have in the bank or how small my house is. Its always entirely
too much money to thoroughly heat it so I keep it at 55 and hand people
blankets on their way in. Surprisingly not too many people come over during
the winter time.

5.) This last one is not so much a habit but a weird trait that
apparently I'm the only one I've ever known to have it. If something smells
offensive to me, it automatically smells like cat urine. I've returned
lotions because they've smelled like cat urine to me, I'm pretty sure that
to anyone else in the free world they didn't, but to me it did enough to
make me gag. Recently I made an entire group of girls in the youth group
throw out their gum before they got in my car cause it smelled like cat
urine and I was going to puke.

Best Boyfriend in the WORLD!!! EVER!!!

ok seriously how can you not like a guy who goes around Hershey Park with a blinking red rudolph nose...
but thats not where it ends
he loves bs!-a dirkin must
he's adorable!!
our hands are the same exact color (creepy but true)
he's adorable!!
he makes me the happiest i've been in my entire life.
and did i mention he's adorable..
Anyways, here are the gorgeous flowers he sent me today... did i mention he's adorable??

Book Review-"A Million Little Pieces

My friends and i have been reading "A Million Little Pieces" here are some discussion questions from the book if you have read it enjoy. If you haven't its a good book, very graffic but gives incredible insight into the life of an addict. Most of us have some type of life experience with an addict of some type this might help you to be able to deal with them better or at least see them in a different light.

1. A Million Little Pieces presents some unusual formal innovations: Instead of using quotation marks, each piece of dialogue is set off on its own line with only occasional authorial indications of who is speaking; paragraphs are not indented; sentences sometimes run together without punctuation; and many passages read more like poetry than prose. How do these innovations affect the pace of the writing? How do they contribute to the book's rawness and immediacy?

It gave the book a rushed sense, when I read it I felt like I was in the frenzied mind of an addict. Especially in the beginning before he goes into rehab and during detox. It was hard to decipher at times as I’m sure going through those things its hard to decipher whats real and whats not.

2. A Million Little Pieces is a nonfiction memoir, but does it also read like a novel? How does Frey create suspense and sustain narrative tension throughout?

I think one way he carried the suspense was in the way the book was written it wasn’t written in an organized formal way it is frenzied and rushed. The story itself made you want to read it, you wanted him to beat this you wanted to see him succeed. I also agree with Kaiya on this by only giving bits and pieces of his past to make you want to know/understand him more.

3. James is frequently torn between wanting to look into his own eyes to see himself completely and being afraid of what he might find: "I want to look beneath the surface of the pale green and see what's inside of me, what's within me, what I'm hiding. I start to look up but I turn away." (p. 32). Why can't James look himself in the eye? Why is it important that he do so?

They say that eyes are the windows to his soul, I think he’s scared of who he really is. He says he really doesn’t remember a time where he wasn’t abusing some type of substance, now he’s suddenly not on anything. He’s never seen who he was without the chemicals and I think he’s scared of it.

4. After meeting with the Doctor (p. 93), James feels as though he's been given a death sentence and reviews his obituary in his head. He finds comfort in plotting his suicide. How does Leonard derail his plans? Were you surprised by their friendship?

I thought it was neat how the friendship developed how Leonard knew where he was coming from and just wanted to help. I think Leonard was an integral part in him getting well, he was a backbone that had been there before who would understand but not let him get away with things.

5. Consider some of the moments of kindness and compassion and genuine human connection that make the book so moving. Why do these moments have such emotional power?

These moments make it real, you can disassociate yourself from a story or a person without these moments. I think the most moving for me was when Lilly leaves the clinic and James goes to find her the care for her was so moving. Her life was so tragic his tenderness towards her was amazing. I also like the dynamic of that one counselor that didn’t get along with James how he helped him find her.

fact or crap

So in looking at all the guidebooks i found this small church in Paris that has an incorruptible saint there. Now an incorruptible saint is a saint who when they die they do not compose. Apparently there are a few of them around and some of them its just pieces of them. Like if some was a great orator thier tongue wouldn't decompose. The one in Paris is a young girl, i don't remember her name but i'm going to look her up in my saint book to read about her. This is one of those things that i'm just not sure about. Sure i believe that God can do everything and anything, but sometimes you just wonder why he would do it. Like all that stuff that was going on in Toronto (like people saying God made them cluck like a chicken) alot of that stuff i just can't see that God would do that. Why would God make a mockery of himself by making people act like fools. I don't get it. I just hold on to the fact that i don't know everything. I know God is good, and i know that he can do far more than i can imagine and i know that He has made me finite, where he is infinite.
I also know i kind of want to see the dead girl to make some type of first hand impression of what i think of it.

goings and goings and goings

So i finally took down the Christmas tree seeing that i haven't watered it in the past 3 weeks i thought it would be the responsible thing to do. Its still on the stand in the front yard, i wanted to put it next to my bedroom window that way it would be like i had trees right out my window. Which would be nice. I'm in the midst of cleaning my house, its gotten pretty bad lately so its gong to be a week long project i think.. We shall see.
Last night i brought in an dresser that Marlena gave me forever ago and stored it in my living room to put all my yarn in. I'm going to rearrange the heck out of the living room tonight i think. Its been the same for two years that is entirely too long.
All in all the holidays and new years were spectacular, i think my best ever. :)
here is a pic from new years of me and my boyfriend Jason.. yeah i know we're cute..


ps where did my eyes go?!?! it looks like i have slits

Anyways everthing is pretty busy here, getting ready to chaperone the youth retreat and anchor myself to my desk, i can't wait for my upcoming trip (paris, switzerland and germany). I literally probably spend 1/2 my day looking up stuff for the trip on the internet and the other half talking to Jason and Kaiya. I'm totally getting a raise soon, i'm such a necessary team player.

In the Navy.....

tough girl Kaitlin, she totally looks like she can kick my butt in this pic. Especially in her new 150 dollar boots (that look soo hot with her pajama pants.)

Shhh internet or 3 people who look at my blog, its a secret. Kaitlin is joining the navy, Kaitlin is my 19 yr old niece who is more like a sister too me. Its been amazing watching Kaitlin grow up and being a part of her life. Seems like only yesterday i went to her t ball games and watched her chase butterflies in the outfield or fix her hair. She's always been a funny kid especially when she used to cry when my mom did her hair and she was upset cause she looked like a helicopter. I love that she never pretended to want to do sports and that she was the best to go shopping with. I'm ashamed of the time i told her her real name was Kaitlin Peterson and that her real parents were coming to get her. She was 4 and still remembers it, I scarred the girl for life and she still loves me. What more can you ask for in a niece. But most importantly i've enjoyed watching her grow into a woman, and just a gorgeous person over all. I admire her for who she is and how hard she works to get what she wants. Now she's joining the navy and i feel nothing but pride and love for my little Kaitgin Herndon. I'm gonna have to get some tshirts and start caring about the Army-Navy game! Go NAVY!! I love you Kaitlin!

We're gonna party like its 1999

Woo Wooo WOOOO Christmas WOOO as Kaitlin says!!
Christmas was INCREDIBLE we partied like crazy.. here are just some of the after party pics. Nothing says party like crashing on some teddy bear rockers.. and of course wearing a lampshade on your head!
WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Christmas time is here..

Right now i'm sitting in the middle of my living room, which is filled with wrapping paper, presents and plastic bags. I'm thinking i went a little overboard with my buying this year, suprise suprise.... I have a stocking filled with stuff for my freaking cat (ok so maybe thats to distract her from mauling my hands....)
but I think i'm finally done my shopping (i still want to get Mason a little gift to give him on Christmas Eve.) The next few days are going to be spent wrapping, cooking, carolling (at Drea's) and with family. All ending with my favorite Christmas Eve service, there is nothing better than that candlelight mass. My best memories in life are of Christmas Eve with my family as a kid. We would go to my grandmoms church in Island Heights after spending the night at my gram's where Santa would come on the firetruck. I think its just so beautiful being in a church with just candles lit. i love the ambiance of it, there is something so reverent about singing and praying in candlelight, I can't wait this is the best time of year!!!!

Who knew!??!

Hmm so do yall remember a guy named Clay Aiken from American Idol. The ultimate Cindarella story from that show, nerdy guy turned into some amazing teen (for lack of a better word) idol.
Well Sunday i'm in church and one of the lady's gives me and Lisa (one of the coolest girls in the youth group) 6 tickets to Clay Aikens Christmas show. Of course i bring some of my girls from the youth group being the incredible youth leader i am ;)
Well little did i know it would be a lesson in how freaking old i am.. One of the girls started literally crying for joy when we told her.. It made me so happy to bring her that it meant so much to her, but i was amazed that Clay Aiken could have that affect on someone. Well anyway we get to the show and there are soo many women who are in LOVE with Clay Aiken. This was a little disconcerting that there were grown women who were obsessed with him.. Hee hee to think someone might be writing these same things about Tom Jones (HOW DARE YOU IF YOU ARE, YOU HAVE NOT BEEN TOUCHED BY THE MAGIC OF TOM!!!!)I was a little upset because you could totally tell he thought he was hot stuff, i was like come on, seriously, have you looked at yourself... YOU ARE THE SAME PERSON GET OVER YOURSELF!!!
I was very proud of my girls though because instead of stuck on himself Aiken they were smitten with the piano playing hottie openning act, William so and so...
See camera phone pics above and below.. :P

snow days

So today i woke up got dressed left and started driving to work, it took me forty minutes to go 3 miles so i turned around and drove to my parents house. I called work and let them know i wasn't coming in and i spent a wonderful morning hanging out with my my mom and dad. They are alot of fun when you don't live with them! I walked in and my dad came down and made waffles for us and then my dad and i played chinese checkers. Which he promptly decided was not his favorite game because i beat him twice. Today is a good day, i miss the snow days of school and sitting around and doing whatever i want. I spent the healthier part of the morning playing games with my dad and reading. Its been gorgeous!!!

Can't help but think of the time i had a snow day when i was younger and went sledding with Tamara and her family. There are huge sand hills down the road from my house so we would always go sledding there, they were soo steep that you wouldn't even need snow to go sledding. We used to go all the time in the summer time, we would have to hide from the people who worked there because it was a rock quarry and we were trespassing. Well this time there was a ton of ice and i scream down the hill on my little sled. Well i'm going maybe like 300 mph and there is about 15 ft of flat ground before there is another little hill. I'm going entirely too fast so i take off of that little hill and what do you know there is a ditch behind it. My sled flys away from me and i'm soaring like 10 ft in the air spread eagle. I slam face down in the ditch beyond amazingly i didn't even get hurt. Thats just one of the times i almost died with Tamara! :)
Actually, i think snow days as an adult are better than those when you're a kid!! I'm kinda up for sledding right now though..

Sunsets

Somehow the bueaty and luster of sunsets are lost when you're in an office watching them. There is this tree that is down the aisle from where i sit and when the sun is hitting it right it looks really pretty. Thats how i spend five days of the week watching the sunset. I think maybe its the flourescent track lighting that makes it not soo special. I don't know i dont think there is much that isn't made more bueatiful when not in the context of work. Well anyways this is a sunset from Duck NC taken a few weeks ago.
Miss Olivia is biting the heck out of my hands right now, so maybe i'll have another post this week about typing with only 2.5 fingers. And to think i almost bought her chia cat grass today at CVS. She's bad enough without kiddie drugs..

Miss Olivia

A few years ago one of my friends got a cat, and when i say cat i use that term loosely what i really mean is demon spawn that meow's. When i would see my friend there would be horrible cuts all over her hands and it looked like she was mutilating herself. I would ask her and she would say how Oliver and she were playing... I thought she was nuts, and on more than one occasion i told her to get rid of this kitty. Well things changed and i moved into a small house in the woods by myself and wanted an animal. I figured the best thing to get was a cat cause i could ignore it and leave for days and it would be ok as long as i left some food or water. I got this tiny little kitten and my friend came over to see her that night. I was torn on a name and we joked that i should name my cat Olivia. Well dumb me i name my cat Miss Olivia. My kitty soon turned into the most demented crazy kittens that i've ever seen. On more than one occasion i've gone to work with scars on my hands from my precious little kitty. She even decided that she had an inherent dislike to a whole family of my friends, they Byrds. Whenever any of the Byrd's would come over she would let out the most unearthly noises. Tonight i was thinking of when i used to tell my friend to get rid of her kitten and i realized that she could never because she felt the same about her Oliver that i do about my Miss Olivia. And i started praying that i have really good kids cause it would be soo much harder to get rid of your kids than your cat.

cleaning and in order

I just spent the whole night reorganizing my house well at least the last hour or so. I've b een reading "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey, wow disturbing. Its probably one of the most graffic books i've ever read. I'm wondering how good of an insight it is into that type of situation (the main character is in a drug rehab) I had to stop reading cause my heart was hurting for everyone who has these problems and i realized i haven't folded my clothes in hmm about 3 weeks. So i did some laundry, made my bed, watered my Christmas tree and folded my clothes.
Its amazing how much a book can color your attitude, i was just reading "Lords of Discipline". I spent the whole time walking around like i was tough or just pretending i was. :) So far the cursing isn't so bad in this one. Next book is going to be something tame, maybe my travel book!
Germany here i come!!

no updates

Sorry i haven't been updating alot recently, i had wireless at the house in north carolina and came home to dial up, sooo sad!!!
I'm at my friends house right now "helping" them pack up to move, i'm a great friend aren't i!

the other love of my life